A request

"Baba," he said, over and over.

I figured he either meant baba au rum or baba ghannoush.  But rum is not for babies.

He loved it.

Baba Ghannoush
Delicious served with fresh baguette, raw vegetables, or by the spoonful.

1 large or 2 small eggplants

4 cloves of garlic

juice of one lemon

4-6 tablespoons sesame tahini, depending on taste

a few tablespoons of water

1/2 teaspoon salt 

a drizzle olive oil

parsley, optional

Preheat the oven to 350 and cut off the stems of the eggplant.  Roast them until soft and partially collapsed, anywhere from 40 minutes to an hour.  Place the garlic cloves in an aluminum foil packet and roast along with the eggplant.  Cut the eggplant open and scrape out the flesh.  Discard skin.
Place the eggplant, garlic, lemon juice, tahini, and salt in the food processor and pulse until combined and creamy.  Add salt to taste and water if necessary to desired creaminess. Chill for several hours. Pour olive oil on top of dip before serving.

A balm for March

A cold March morning summoned me to the kitchen for something comforting.  I reached for Ruth's recipe box and found three different recipes for rice pudding.  I chose the one with the most eggs, six.  I had never tried this recipe, which is made in the oven, not the stove top.  That would be nice, I thought, not to have to skim away the skin that forms as the milk boils.  Out came a nice quart of milk, a retro glass bottle I had bought recently, thinking of Ruth and how she must have bought her milk.  I was feeling cozier already.  

As I made my way through the shorthand recipe- cooking the rice till firm, separating the eggs, beating the yolks till thick and lemony, I felt confident in my ability.  I beat the whites until foamy.  Maybe I over beat them, yes I think that's where I went wrong.  Combining the whites with the rice and yolks, I found they would not fold in properly.  They ended up sitting, floating on top of the pudding.  This is stupid, I thought. Why couldn't Ruth have been more explicit? Should I have used a whisk or a spatula? Just how foamy did she mean?

I was not about to waste organic eggs and milk.  I would eat the pudding myself but just not share the recipe.  For the rest of the day my thoughts turned deeper, from this kitchen mishap to what I've missed the most in the two and a half decades or more without my mother and grandmother.  Tangible things like visits, phone calls, letters, one of those hugs. Advice on cooking, advice on child rearing and relationships.  Anecdotes of how to get through the day to day.  Stories of their pregnancies, their childbirths.  Intangibles like knowing that a source of support exists, pulling for me. 

Then I realized that having an incomplete recipe is just a metaphor for that missing link to my past, that hole I've felt all these years.  "Figure it out" is basically how her recipes are written.  Figuring it out is what I've been doing all these years.  When you don't have someone to spell it out and guide you, the result must be resilience.  

-For Lisa and Alexandra, the most resilient of all.

Grilled Cheese

It's funny how there are many lessons our parents teach us without trying.  Growing up around a man who blasted opera in the house every Sunday so loud the neighbors had to shut their windows was  desperately embarrassing.  He always had a song, either whistling or singing in public.  I remember how much this annoyed me as a teenager.  However, these things have a way of rubbing off on a person.  Now singing is a tool I use to calm my nerves or lighten my mood.  It costs absolutely nothing and if I really get into it, I might even get someone to join in.

He also exposed me to the art of making great grilled cheese sandwiches.  It involves a good amount of resourcefulness, finding flavorful treasures, objets trouvés to tuck inside the sandwich.   You need some zing in the way of a spicy mustard, or something pickled.  Sometimes the best sandwiches, (soups too) come from found objects.  No recipe, no planning, just bits and pieces pulled from the refrigerator. It's about versatility as much as flexibility.

Sometimes it's the unintentional lessons that prove most valuable.

Here is one of my own recent creations.
Here is what I used to make 2 extraordinary sandwiches:

4 slices of the best sourdough bread you can find (or make)
1 zucchini, sliced thinly lengthwise
4 shallots, sliced thinly
6 slices smoked turkey or ham (substitute extra vegetables if you don't eat deli meats.)
2 cheeses -  I suggest Parano, Gouda or Emmentaler for one and a harder cheese like parmesan for the second cheese.

Red pepper relish  (takes about 25 minutes to make, or you could use store bought) Alternately you could use a pesto or mustard.

Grill the zucchini slices on a grill pan, under the broiler or on an outdoor grill if you have access to one.
Saute the sliced shallots in olive oil until very soft.  Stir them frequently for about ten minutes.
Build your sandwiches by layering the ingredients on one side of the bread- relish, zucchini, turkey, shallots, one of the cheeses.  Grill the sandwiches on a grill pan or a frying pan (add butter to one side of the bread) and then transfer them to a baking sheet.  Grate the second cheese on top of the sandwich and finish in the oven at 375 for a few minutes to melt the cheese.

WebRep

currentVote

noRating

noWeight

Pumpkin Quinoa Muffins

We live in a time of so many choices.  What to do with our days, our lives, who we want to be, what we stand for.  As a little girl, even into my twenties, I dreamt of notoriety.  As a ten year old, I signed my diary entries with a grand flourish, convinced that one day the world would read them when I  became a famous dancer.  I declared that I'd never have kids because I would be too busy as a diva on the stages Europe. 

These are just muffins, but to me, they represent a lot more.  You see, the diva in me would probably have had a staff in charge of menial daily chores.  But I could never give up certain things for the sake of an "easier" life.  The hard worker in me thrives on stirring up a batch of the granola that Roman loves, whipping up some of his favorite multigrain pear waffles for second breakfast, and so on for lunch and dinner.  In between there is laundry and there are always dishes to be done.  

I know I've grown up because I'm grateful for my life as it is.  I feel settled and no longer need the attention I once craved.  There is order, calm and purpose in caring for other people- something I never would have understood as a younger person.  I'm just living.  Trying to help my people thrive and grow.  Modest tasks.  And for now, this is how I go on, one snack at a time.

Pumpkin Quinoa Muffins

Adapted from Bob's Red Mill's recipe

1 1/4 cups whole wheat flour

3/4 cup brown sugar

1 teaspoon cinnamon

1 teaspoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon sea salt

3/4 cup cooked Quinoa

2 large eggs

3/4 cup canned pumpkin (unsweetened)

1/2 cup buttermilk

4 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted

1 teaspoon vanilla extract (optional)

1/4 cup raw shelled pepitas (pumpkin seeds)

Preheat the oven to 400.

In a large bowl, combine the flour, sugar, cinnamon, baking powder and soda, salt.  Stir well with a whisk.  Add the cooked and cooled quinoa and stir with a whisk or fork to break up any clusters. 

In a measuring cup, beat the two eggs and add to the flour mixture. Measure out the buttermilk and combine it with the pumpkin, adding this to the large bowl.  Add the melted butter and the vanilla if using.  

Fill 12 muffin tins (grease them or use muffin liner cups if needed) about 3/4 of the way and sprinkle each muffin with pumpkin seeds.  Bake for 30-35 minutes until a toothpick comes out clean.  Cool them in the tins for about ten minutes before turning them out to cool completely on a rack.  These muffins freeze well.

* To cook quinoa, rinse one cup of dry quinoa well using a fine mesh strainer.  Boil 2 cups of water, then add the quinoa, cover the pot and simmer for 12 minutes.  Remove from heat and leave the cover on the pot for another 10 minutes, then fluff with a fork.  

Soup and Survival

 

I was not supposed to get the flu, but I did. It came after a cold and a stomach bug.  It hit me hard (despite the infamous flu shot) and left me resolved to shore up my reserves.  Enough is enough.  After four days of convalescing, I ate two huge bowls of this amazing soup and suddenly the run down feeling left my body.  That was yesterday.  I made it again today to prolong the feelings of self preservation, restoration, survival.  The winter is nowhere near over, so if I have to eat this every day, I just might do that.

This magical soup, "sick soup" came to me by way of text message from my cousin Laurie, who got it from her friend when her own son was sick.  Before that, I can't trace it any farther back.  I'd like to thank the universe for putting this soup out there for me because the healing properties are numerous.  12 cloves of garlic.  Ginger, onion, cabbage, chili, lime juice.  Grandma's chicken noodle soup is cowering in the corner feeling pretty meager next to this.

I think we all agree, getting sick is the pits.  But winter and germs are here to stay, so in case you need it- here's the recipe.  Stay strong.

"Sick Soup"
This soup lends itself well to variations. The photo below shows a version I just made using shiitake mushrooms and firm tofu.  Add the mushrooms about half way through the cooking, and stir in the diced tofu once you have turned off the flame.

6 cups water
1 white onion, cut in half then sliced thinly
1 medium cabbage (use as much of the cabbage as you like), sliced into 1 inch pieces
12 cloves garlic, peeled (thinly slice 6, and chop the other 6)
4 inch piece of ginger, peeled and grated
2 carrots, peeled and sliced
1 red chili cut in half, seeds removed and thinly sliced (omit the chili if serving someone who cannot tolerate spice)
juice of 1 lime
1-2 tablespoons sesame oil
salt to taste

Boil the water in a large pot and add all the ingredients except the lime juice, sesame oil and salt. Cover the pot and simmer the soup over medium heat for 30 minutes.  Turn off the heat, add the lime juice, sesame oil and salt to taste.  Enjoy this soup piping hot.

Brownies - lifting spirits

These days, my refrigerator is stocked with kale, mushrooms of all shapes and sizes, colorful peppers.  I  buy so much fruit we can barely eat it before it gets too ripe.  But today I want to share a brownie recipe because this time of year  there is already enough nutritional advice being dished out.  This is about lifting spirits, and these brownies have that capability.  

 

In August, a close relative cautioned me not to lose myself with the birth of my second child. I think a lot about what aspects I may have lost, whether those features of my life/self were important to me and how becoming responsible for two small people opened up a whole new world.  Some days I feel like super woman, capable of carrying a large baby through the NYC streets in 19 degree weather, toting all the groceries,  naming every car make and model in a four  block radius for an eager three year old.  Other days, I feel vulnerable, crouched deep in the trenches of motherhood with a sick child, overwhelmed with the sheer duty to these two young lives, but abounding with love. 

  

While I can strive to find balance and prioritize time for myself, the fact is, my work is cut out for me. My joy comes (in between tantrums) in the form of restorative hugs, toothy grins, impromptu dance parties with Roman. When I need a little guilty pleasure that I don't need to share, there is chocolate.  Not meditation, yoga or free time- but chocolate.

  

There is no 'one size fits all' recipe for brownies.  There are a million versions that people claim are the best, and maybe they're all partially right. I have strong opinions in this matter and my ultimate brownie is flourless, almost fudge-like, loaded with toasted walnuts, and made with the best chocolate I could find.

 

I wish you all the best in 2013.  I hope you'll treat yourself to something delicious on your way.

My Best Brownies
This brownie recipe from Ready for Dessert by David Lebovitz knocked my socks off, although I made a few changes to his already "perfect" brownies.  I substituted hazelnut flour for the all-purpose flour.  I also added espresso powder to make the chocolate stand out even more.  I have written the recipe below exactly as I made it.

6 tablespoons unsalted butter cut into pieces
8 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped (I used Callebaut)
3/4 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon espresso powder
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 large eggs, room temperature
1/4 cup hazelnut flour (you could also use almond flour or regular flour)
1 cup toasted walnuts

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.
Line the inside of a square cake pan (mine was 8 inch) with parchment.  Lightly grease the parchment with butter.
In a medium saucepan, melt the butter, then add the chocolate and stir over medium heat until the chocolate is melted and smooth.  Remove from the heat and stir in the sugar, espresso powder and vanilla until combined.  With your wooden spoon, beat in the eggs one at a time.  Add the hazelnut flour and stir energetically for one full minute.  Stir in the chopped, toasted nuts.  Scrape the batter into the prepared pan and bake until the center feels almost set.  This took about 40 minutes for me, but check starting at 30.  Let cool completely in the pan before lifting out the parchment to remove the brownies.  These will keep for four days at room temperature.  I chose to wrap mine individually and freeze them for a treat when I need it.

Lemon Cream Cheese Tart with a Gingersnap Crust

 

Taking care of a 3 year old and a 3 month old has sapped any energy I had for extraneous activities. My cooking has become predictable.  As my sister wisely said, right now my life is more about survival than perfection.  While I often feel like I'm being challenged to my core, I am lucky enough to be showered with smiles every morning from both boys.  That's enough to keep me going.

The exceedingly gray skies of late call for a little culinary levity. The pretty yellow color and zing of lemon and ginger are a pick-me-up and just what I needed.  

It's funny how a food treat can feel like a visit from an old friend.  A simple boost that helps me continue on my daily march.

I wish you all the coziest of times as 2012 comes to a close.  May you be showered with gifts of smiles, good food and warm, safe homes. 

Ruth's Lemon Cream Cheese Tart

Adapted from my Grandmother's recipe

Plan ahead by taking the eggs and cream cheese out of the fridge a few hours before you want to make this.

For the tart crust:

8 ounces ginger cookies (I used store bought from Whole Foods Market)

4 tablespoons unsalted butter

Finely process the cookies in a food processor.  Melt the butter, then pour it into the food processor and pulse to combine.  Place a  9 inch tart shell with removable bottom on a baking sheet.  Press the crushed cookies into the shell.  Bake at 325 degrees for 10 minutes and allow to cool while you proceed with the filling.

For the filling:

3 large eggs at room temperature

1/2 cup granulated sugar

Zest and juice of 1 organic lemon

8 oz package of cream cheese, softened to room temperature
fresh berries for garnish (optional)

Use a handheld electric beater to beat the eggs until light in a double boiler (bain marie); then beat in sugar gradually.  Stir in lemon zest and juice. Stir constantly over the heat with a wooden spoon for about 7-10 minutes until the eggs begin to thicken to a custardy consistency.  Add the cream cheese (must be room temperature) and use the electric beater again to blend thoroughly.  Several more minutes over the heat should do the trick.  Spoon this into your prepared tart shell.  Cool on the counter.  You could serve this warm, or if you want to prepare it ahead of time, simply chill it in the refrigerator until you are ready to serve.